Our Tone Speaks Louder than Words

Have you ever been accused of being harsh when that wasn’t your intention at all? Or maybe you’ve come across as meek and mild when you really meant business! If you have ever walked away from a conversation and wondered why things went completely differently than you planned—keep in mind that your tone of voice certainly goes a long way with how others perceive your message. Sometimes it’s not what you say, but how you say it! There are a few tips and tricks you can use in order to make sure your tone matches your message.

Think about what you are saying.
If an important conversation lies ahead, plan for it. How do you want the person to feel after your talk? Do you want him or her to know you think they are special? Do you need someone to know that his or her actions disappointed you? Think about the end-result and you are more likely to use the appropriate tone.

Consider the Situation
It’s important to think about the situation in which you will be speaking to another person. Is it a work environment? Are you asking someone out on a date? You don’t want to sound too casual when you are addressing colleagues, just as you wouldn’t want to seem stiff when speaking to friends or your date.

Face It
If you are unsure whether or not your tone is appropriate, try using facial features to help you get the job done. For example, if you want to use an upbeat tone, perhaps you should try smiling as you carry on a conversation. If you want a more serious tone allow your face to relax.

Record Yourself
Still having trouble? Consider recording yourself so that you can replay your talking voice. This is a great way to catch on to any unintentional tones and an excellent strategy to use if you want to improve your speaking voice.